I don't feel like I'm wanted here at all anymore. It's like none of my housemates give a shit that I'm depressed and that I might-MIGHT-want to be included. Anytime I pop downstairs to talk or whatever they are all doing something together. And it's like they can't wait for me to leave. Because of course, they all stop what they're doing until I leave. I'm not sure if I prefer it to being completely ignored. Which is what happens the other half of the time.
Even now my throat is clogged up (and not just because I think I'm coming down with a cold) because NONE OF THEM ASKED IF I WAS OKAY, OR IF I WANTED TO JOIN THEM. It's not difficult. All I need is a few words. Some sign that they actually care about me or at least slightly enjoy my company.
Oh and on top of that someone else may be moving in; Rs. I don't know him and this was basically agreed upon two days before anyone told me. And I was only told because I mentioned using the office for tutoring. But that was shot down immediately because poor little Rs doesn't like his current housemates. Boo-hoo. Neither do I. Doesn't mean I'm going to move in with people when one or more of them don't 100% approve.
And the way things stand right now it's going to be a year before I can move out.
Nothing takes the enjoyment out of life like reality.
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